I‘m sure every cat lover in the world recognizes this image from “Shrek 2.” I watched this film in the theater and the reaction this scene got from the entire audience is pretty amazing. A loud “awwwww!” rose up from the audience, nearly blasting the screen away. Babies squealed in glee and adults fainted in their seats. The sheer cuteness overload was such that mass ovulation, if not pregnancy, was induced. In a word, it was insane.

Since then, I’ve wanted my own Shrek cat, a kitty with big, velvety black liquid eyes and dainty, folded back ears. Well, I didn’t realize that those signs in real-life cats mean murder. Behold!

Crrrrazy!
I was innocently eating my lunch the other day when I noticed Taroko George stalking me from the other side of the coffee table.

George contemplates my destruction

Silently, George pleaded with me to let him drink my blood.

Eek!

I screamed “No!” and ran into the bedroom. Taroko George is freakin’ crazy!

Seriously, though, Georgie is a very sweet cat and Ron and I love him to bits (as in, our cat wants to chew us to bits). My family adopted our first kitten when I was 8 years old and since then we’ve always had a feline in the fold. Despite having lived with a total of five cats over the last 20 years, each of their “catsonalities” always surprises and delights me.

When Ron and I were in the process of discussing our future together after graduate school, he mentioned over dinner at a Mexican restaurant that he might be allergic to cats. I spat out a mouthful of chicken flauta, slammed my glass of horchata into the wall and screamed “GODDAMMIT! That’s a deal breaker for me! A deal breaker!”

Ron said, “I just wanted to let you know the worst case scenario, because I know you want a cat.”

“And I’ll let you know mine,” I screamed, as I smeared salsa all over my face in a fit of pique. “No cat, no Cat-herine!”

As it turned out, Ron isn’t allergic to cats, so I didn’t have to break up with him. That would have been really sad, you know, because I love Ron. But I loooooooooove my cats.